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another one from mom

is this really how people see areas of nawlins????
it is kinda sad, really.....





The list of the top Barbie dolls this holiday season -- made especially
for New Orleans shoppers:



 
Evacuee Barbie - Comes with a suitcase with three changes of old
clothes, a box of photographs, and pets.



 
Rooftop Barbie - Comes with an ax for chopping a hole in her roof, a
flashlight to signal helicopters, and a blue tarp to patch the hole when
she returns.



 
Red Cross Barbie - Comes with Red Cross uniform, and her own Red Cross
truck capable of serving 1,000 meals per day.



 
FEMA Barbie - Comes with laptop computer, cell phone, and plain white
trailer. (Trailer not delivered until 90 days after purchase.)



 
Going Home Barbie - Comes with haz-mat suit, boots, gloves, respirator
mask, shovel, and bin for holding recovered items.



 
Looter Barbie - Comes with shotgun, hundreds of gold chains, and
shopping cart filled with Nike shoes, electronics, and an assortment of
alcohol. (NOPD Ken, equally outfitted, can be purchased separately --
and comes with a Cadillac Escalade.)



 
Northshore Barbie - This princess Barbie is sold only at North Shore
Mall. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade handbags, a Lexus SUV,
a long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a cookie-cutter house.
Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold
separately.

 

Kenner Barbie - This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with a
Ford Windstar minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and
has no full-time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell
phone sold separately.



 
Treme Barbie - This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a
Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit.
This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash
(preferably small, untraceable bills)...unless you're a cop, then we
don't know what you're talking about.



 
Old Metairie Barbie - This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW
convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbuck's cup, credit
card and country club membership. Also available for this set are
Shallow Ken and Private School Sandy.



 
Chalmette Barbie - This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler
jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR T-shirt and Tweety Bird tattoo on
her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams, Jr.
CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mulllet-haired Ken's butt when
she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate
flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

 
Garden District Barbie - This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie
wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining
friends. Percocet prescription available.

 
Westwego Barbie - This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair
of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she
chased beer-gutted Ken out of Gretna Barbie's house. Her ensemble
includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through
halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.

 
Mid-City Barbie - This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long
straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy armpits, no make-up and
Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She
does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Mid-City
Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper
sticker for free. 
 

 
Algiers Barbie - This Barbie comes with a stroller and an infant doll.
Optional accessories include a GED and a bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his
79 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the
addition of the infant.

 
Metairie Barbie - She's wearing a Banana Republic outfit and watching
her soaps on TV. She has her cell phone in hand, along with her home
phone and day planner. On her planner she has the dates of all her
charity events listed. We don't know where Ken is because he's always
fishing or hunting.

Comments

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
violetonly
Dec. 2nd, 2006 01:10 pm (UTC)
No, this is how people in New Orleans portray themselves.
Versions of this have been going around for years. They began quite generically, the yuppie Barbie, the trailer trash Barbie, etc. After a while a bored local will *tweak* the descriptions and localize them (I've received Barbie descriptions from friends in so. Cal & Texas The Algiers barbie was Barrio Barbie, The Mid City Barbie was Pacific Beach Barbie Etc.) Think of it this way, Does Joe Blow in Minnesota know that Westwego exists? Does he know that it is a predominately working class area? The saddest thing is that locals, instead of pulling together continue to think of the greater NO area in this divisive way.
melissamuse
Dec. 2nd, 2006 04:45 pm (UTC)
i haven't had the misfortune to come across the barbie analogies before. ugh. yes, it is sad that we continue to do this. i just want to note my mother doesn't send me all these wacky things because she enjoys them...she knows they "stimulate" me ;) last week she sent me some stupid flash movie about americans crossing into mexico to have babies and collect welfare. she knew it would piss me off.

oh by the way...i have something for you to read. :)

She is as in a field a silken tent
At midday when the sunny summer breeze
Has dried the dew and all its ropes relent,
So that in guys it gently sways at ease,
And its supporting central cedar pole,
That is its pinnacle to heavenward
And signifies the sureness of the soul,
Seems to owe naught to any single cord,
But strictly held by none, is loosely bound
By countless silken ties of love and thought
To everything on earth the compass round,
And only by one’s going slightly taut
In the capriciousness of summer air
Is of the slightest bondage made aware.

maybe it will change your mind a little about Frost ;) Mending Wall is very moving also...how people are stuck in their ways even when there is no need to be.
violetonly
Dec. 4th, 2006 02:57 pm (UTC)
I tend to keep my religious and political views close to the vest. My Family knows me well enough to understand that I do so out of respect for their feelings and the knowledge that they do not wish to change their views even with faced with incontrovertible evidence. Unfortunately my SIL is not as bright as the rest of my family and assumes I share her ist/ic philosophy.


Robert Frost.... That was a hard semester. Work and trying to study with a house full of displaced family. Oddly enough this year, we are back to just the two of us and I find... I miss them.
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )

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don't fear death
melissamuse
melissa muses (or maia, you choose)

Roma

wandering does not make you a "gypsy."
why would you call yourself
after those who have no home?
long skirts and hoop earrings
do not make you a "gypsy."
why do you call yourself after
those who have no clothes?

"gypsy" is pejorative. please don't perpetuate the stereotype. educate yourself on what it really means to be a "gypsy" in this world.

Who are the Roma?

Decade of Roma Inclusion

Dženo Association

European Roma Rights Centre

Roma Balkans

Roma National Congress

Romani World

Rombase

Rroma

Rroma Media Network

Soros Roma Initiatives

Studii Romani

The European Union and Roma

The Patrin Webjournal: Romani Culture and History

Voice of Roma
World Bank Roma Initiatives

Have a Happy Day! :)

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